Recovering From Burnout: Steps to Shine Brightly Again
Everyone has been working so hard on their messages of anti-productivity lately. (See what I did there?)
Anyone else notice the current popularity of less-productivity, more ease, a slower approach to moving back into the frenetic pace of real-work-life alongside the typical New Year detox messaging? Detox from dopamine! Detox from productivity! Detox from alcohol, and digital, and…
Whether you’re embracing a dry January, jumping full force into resolution season, or just moving through the motions as usual, I have noticed there is a lot of collective burnout going around right now. Of course, it’s more than just the time of year. A new year typically signals a fresh start and with that comes the pressure to create, invest, produce, sell, engage, communicate, and push with a renewed sense of urgency and passion. However, THIS new year in particular is carrying some pretty heavy legacy baggage, including the seemingly never-ending, ever-evolving pandemic, economic stressors, and general fatigue with hustle culture. Ugh.
Many high-performers (especially women) who once sparkled, loved their lives, pursued their passions, and, in so doing, changed lives have fallen victim to the stress and fatigue that all too often come along with giving too much of themselves. It’s easy to feel overwhelmed, stuck, emotionally drained, unable to meet constant demands and… yes, burnt out.
From a clinical perspective, burnout is defined as a state of emotional, physical, and mental exhaustion caused by excessive and prolonged stress.
It is a cunning thief that robs the world of its best and its brightest by feeding on their energy, enthusiasm, and passion, transforming these positive qualities into exhaustion, frustration, and disillusionment. But the good news is that burnout is not a terminal condition. If you've become a victim of burnout, if you are feeling a little less ra-ra-resolutions-sparklers and a little more BURN-IT-ALL-DOWN and head for the hills, here are some steps you can use to reignite your flame and shine brightly once more.
NOTE: Often when I'm feeling stuck I turn to my journal with one simple question:
"If a friend came to me with the exact problems I'm facing now, what advice would I give them?"
This can be a very helpful approach if you are someone who feels overwhelmed with their own problems but finds it easy to give advice to others: just pretend you are the other person. And, if this doesn’t apply, never mind! Just read the tips below and take what serves you.
The first thing I'd say is to radically accept and make peace with the idea that it never gets easier. Sounds gloomy, right? Consider this: the more you succeed, the harder it gets. You think it would get easier — after all you're more skilled, have more money, a bigger audience, bigger opportunities. And maybe it does get easier, but you just use those new advantages to tackle bigger and bigger problems. So for ambitious people it actually gets harder over time. Use this as a source of encouragement and FUEL.
Second, remember to focus on what you can control, specifically on the things that do not change no matter what year it is, time of year it is, how you’re feeling etc. There's always shiny new things going on, but a relentless focus on your mission, purpose, key stakeholders (including yourself) is a winning strategy. The tendency to focus on problems can be habitual so another winning strategy is training yourself to focus on creating the emotions you would want to feel if this problem were already solved and when you succeed at that, celebrate the energetic shift as much as you would the positive resolution to your dilemma. There’s some specific techniques I teach to help you get really good at this with the Energy Leadership Assessment and Debrief coaching package I offer.
Look up from what's immediately in front of your feet. Do this by thinking from the goal vs. thinking of the goal. Thinking from the goal fuels you to take action from the mindset of the person you will become once you’ve obtained your desire. This perspective of already being successful helps you stay “in the game”. I was reminded recently of how many colleagues I have partnered with over the years who aren't moving toward their big goals anymore. They gave up, lost their way, pivoted in the wrong direction, or failed. I’ve just kept on going. I show up every day and never stop. Because… the only way to fail is to give up and why would I do that when in my mind, I’ve already won.
These three things are internal in nature: an attitude shift, a focus shift, and a perspective shift.
Here are five more practical steps you can take to help cope with burnout – external, action items:
Just say "no." While you're recovering from this feeling of overwhelm, avoid taking on any new commitments or responsibilities. I know you have to live in the real world and there will be some things that you just can't get out of doing. But high octane performers have a bad habit of saying "yes" when they can AND SHOULD say "no” – resist the urge to overcommit. This can look like delegating as many things as possible, even if the person you're delegating to may not do them as quickly or as well as you would. Put your mind at ease about this by telling yourself that you aren’t yourself (or your best self) right now and thus it would be better to allow someone else to SHOW UP in your place.
Take breaks between big projects. Burnout puts your mind and body in a weakened state, so avoid jumping from one stressful, time-consuming project to the next in order to give your mind and body a chance to recover. Remember that saying NOT NOW or NEXT WEEK isn’t the same as turning down an opportunity with finality.
Control your devices and responses. Gadgets, such as our phones, iPads, computers, and laptops, consume large amounts of your time and energy. Turn them off as much as possible. And resist the urge to immediately respond to messages and emails. If you’ve fallen into a bad habit of scrolling mindlessly, or knee jerk responding to every “ping” your receive, put your phone away, out of sight, in a purse or a drawer, and busy your hands with other things. If you like to cook, consider prepping some food; do a chore that occupies your hands, like laundry or vacuuming, or simply pick up a book. (Need some suggestions on what’s worth a read? Check out the list here!)
Take an inventory. Make a list of all the situations that cause you to feel stressed, anxious, worried, frustrated, and helpless. Don't rush through it. It's not a race; it's a process. In fact, you should consider it a work in progress, adding to it as things enter your mind. Next to each item on the inventory, write down at least one way to modify that situation to reduce its stress, and then begin implementing them in your routine. Don't get frustrated if you don't see immediate changes. Burnout doesn't happen overnight, so it's unrealistic to expect it to go away overnight. Consistent implementation of positive changes in your routine is the best way to see improvement.
Vary the pace at which you work. Do this by taking intentional breaks throughout the day to reignite creativity. One thing I’ve learned is that we can never really get it “done” because there’s always more to do. And, as Abraham Hicks always says, ‘since you can never get it done, you can never get it wrong’, so there’s never a need to stress over time. We’re in one long race to essentially “nowhere” so the world won’t implode if you renegotiate a deadline, take a nap in the middle of your work day, cancel that recurring meeting and instead go outside. Rest can’t happen just on the holidays. Some days (and maybe even weeks) it's in your best interest to intentionally slow down the rate at which you accomplish things. Instead of doing all five things on your list, do two and do them slowly and with ease. Set up your workspace with all the things you love (music, tea, favorite pens) and relish working at a speed that makes you feel good. This creates space for inspiration to creep back in.
Those are some internal and external methods for dealing with burnout, but here is one general tip before I go: rediscover your passion. Every high-achieving person I have ever known had one thing in common—a passion. If you're like most victims of burnout, that passion has probably lost its meaning in some way, leaving you feeling physically exhausted and emotionally depleted. But rediscovering it (or finding a new one) with a new self-awareness that it doesn't have to be all-consuming can be the spark you need to reignite your flame. This may mean you have to redefine your roles at work, home, or both. It may mean that you have to find a way to redistribute the load you're carrying. Or it may mean that you have to find a new passion, one that will offer more balance so you can enjoy life the way you once did.
As much as I can (and will continue to) advise and help, these are all methods and tools you must both discover and implement for yourself. However, there is one thing I am sure of: if you tackle burnout as you've tackled all the other challenges in your life, you'll succeed. It's not in your nature to do anything else.
And, while only you can do the work, you can have some guidance along the way. Schedule some time to talk with me about the benefits of my Energy Leadership program.
