Don’t Resolve: Eliminate!
10… 9… 8… 7… cue the countdowns! Pop the bubbly! And… here comes resolution season.
I’m sure I don’t have to remind you: 2022 is just days away and with the calendar flip, we can expect the annual rhetoric about making and keeping New Year's Resolutions.
We make pledges to lose weight, make more money, exercise more, spend more time with family, start that business, take that class, etc. All of our most noble endeavors and loftiest desires come flooding to the surface on January 1st.
Our intentions are good. Our efforts are sincere. So, why are these resolutions most often abandoned by February?
All of this reminds me of something Wayne Dyer once said: “When you squeeze an orange, you'll always get orange juice to come out. What comes out is what's inside. The same logic applies to you: when someone squeezes you, puts pressure on you, or says something unflattering or critical, and out of you comes anger, hatred, bitterness, tension, depression, or anxiety, that is what's inside. If love and joy are what you want to give and receive, change your life by changing what's inside.”
Part of the reason we can’t get our goals to “stick” is because as much as we may want to achieve them, all of our effort is put toward trying to attain them without first changing what’s getting in the way of us having them in the first place -- and, usually, that has more to do with what’s on the inside of us.
For example, you may have a resolution to exercise more. But when you’re exhausted from working all day, trying to figure out what to feed your family for dinner, and wondering how you’re going to get that laundry done/read that important article/prep your next presentation… yeah, you’re tired and overwhelmed. So, forget the exercise. You don’t have time.
Or maybe you want to make more money. But when you’re working a full time job and putting all of the energy and “extra” cash you have into trying to build that side hustle and have yet to make a single sale… yeah, you’re discouraged and confused. You don’t have what it takes.
Look, I’m not against making New Year's Resolutions (or any other type of goal-setting), but I’ve found that the goal itself is not the problem or the solution. I know I am capable of achieving anything and everything I put my mind to. However, before I can achieve it, I have to eliminate everything that gets in the way of me reaching my desired destination.
This year, before you set out to write down a New Year’s resolution list and then start praying to the high heavens that you’ll stick to it this time, I’d like to invite you to try something different.
Instead consider this: write down everything you need to get rid of first in order to reach your goal. This could include negative thinking, negative emotions, negative people, and more.
New Thought Leader and author Catherine Ponder calls this an Elimination List. In her book, Open Your Mind to Prosperity, she wrote that in order to attract the good you want, you must first clean up your mind and heart to receive it: “by writing out what you want to eliminate, you open the space and create a vacuum for what you want to manifest. Just like planting a victory garden, you want to clear and weed the soil so that it is clean and fertile before planting your highest quality seeds and plants (dreams and desires).”
Light your favorite candle, pour a glass of bubbly (unless alcohol is what you are supposed to be eliminating lol - in that case tea will do just fine) and get to writing out everything you are ready to chuck for 2022.
In the examples above, this elimination process could look like getting rid of obstacles to your goal of exercising more by rearranging your schedule to allow for a mid-day workout (to avoid end-of-day burnout) or adding an hour to your day with an earlier wake time so you can eliminate last-minute prep work. For making more money, it could look like eliminating wheel-spinning work and taking a profit-first approach, like only building what you know your audience wants and will sell.
Make your Elimination List. Read the list daily for 30 days. Then read it whenever you feel overwhelmed, discouraged, or just plain tired. You will be surprised at just how invigorating it can be to make space you need for growth. Your goals won’t disappear just because you didn’t write them down or resolve to make them happen at the flip of a calendar. After all, haven’t you had the same resolutions year after year after year?
Want a different outcome this year? Try a different approach. And, unlike that orange, when the squeeze comes, you can determine what comes out.
