Tihanna Louise

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The Great Resignation is Also The Great Reflection

Odds are, either you are leaving your job to look for a better one OR are already starting that new “better” job OR you know someone who is actively looking for a new job for themselves. In her excellent article, Reflections on the Great Resignation, Dr. Meisha-Ann Martin references a survey of more than 3,500 workers in the U.S., UK, Ireland, and Canada, which found nearly 4 in 10 (38 percent) workers said they plan to look for a new job in the next 12 months. Compare those figures to the findings of Workhuman’s December 2019 survey when just 21 percent—almost half as many workers—were looking for a new job. And, as recently as September 2021, quit rates continued to increase in 15 states, according to the latest data from the U.S Bureau of Labor Statistics.

And 38% means it’s either you or someone you know.  Or maybe both.

What’s Really Driving The Great Resignation?

While much of the media discussion about the Great Resignation has focused on employee dissatisfaction with wages, a recent MIT Study, which analyzed 34 million online employee profiles to identify U.S. workers who left their employer for any reason (including quitting, retiring, or being laid off) between April and September 2021 revealed how frequently and positively employees mentioned compensation (it ranked 16th) among all topics in terms of predicting employee turnover. This result is consistent with a large body of evidence that pay has only a moderate impact on employee turnover.

Bottom line: a desire to get a bigger paycheck isn’t the most important factor when it comes to where you choose to work.

In general, corporate culture is a much more reliable predictor of industry-adjusted attrition than how employees assess their compensation. The MIT Study found a toxic corporate culture is 10.4 times more powerful than compensation in predicting a company’s attrition rate compared with its industry.

So… if you dread going to work, even if the pay is good, you’re more likely to look for employment elsewhere than if you simply want a bigger paycheck.

What constitutes a toxic corporate culture?

Since a toxic corporate culture is by far the strongest predictor of industry-adjusted attrition and is 10 times more important than compensation in predicting turnover, it would be a good idea to define what a “toxic corporate culture” looks like. I’ve already addressed some of the key ingredients of a toxic corporate environment, but basically the leading elements contributing to toxic cultures include:

  • Failure to promote diversity, equity, and inclusion; (in a REAL, impact-driven way that’s more than “performative”)

  • Workers feeling disrespected or undervalued and taken advantage of; 

  • Unethical behavior; passive aggressive behavior;

  • Unwillingness to innovate or adopt new trends (be agile/flexible);

  • Failure to accurately represent assignments, tasks, responsibilities and an accompanying lack of accountability;

  • Engaging in gaslighting, bullying, and other forms of unhealthy communication;  unhealthy sorority/fraternity culture;

  • And a failure to recognize and compensate excellent performance.

Where does all of this lead?  B-U-R-N-O-U-T.  It seems like I’ve been discussing this for weeks on end now!  This is because the topic of burnout is what keeps coming up the most in every professional community or circle I’m in. The reality I’m experiencing is that more people are tired and are no longer begging, but rather demanding for something to shift. (For more on this and some coping techniques that do NOT involve getting a new job, check out another recent article).

Side Note: You don’t have to be in a traditional corporate culture to experience a toxic work environment.

Interestingly enough, “passion-driven” or businesses can be some of the most difficult to endure.  Staying at the bleeding edge of innovation, content and product creation, development, and ideation typically requires employees, contractors, entrepreneurs, and the self-employed to put in longer hours, work at a faster pace, and endure more stress than they would in an ideally slower-moving, more corporate environment. The work may be exciting and satisfying but also difficult to sustain in the long term; they are more likely to struggle with work-life balance and a manageable workload. During the Great Resignation, even the people without traditional employers may be reconsidering the personal toll that relentless striving takes.

How to Use The Great Resignation As The Great Reflection

A coaching client of mine was perfectly on-trend.  She was experiencing microaggressions, gaslighting and other failures from the leadership in her company.  So, she recently jumped ship from this extremely toxic work environment in the hopes of finding greener pastures in a new corporate job.  New company, new surroundings, new opportunities.

Guess what happened?

She jumped right from one toxic work environment into another one.

And, she’s not the only one.  Behavioral patterns and “loops” are extremely common for all human beings and organizations (which, btw, is just a group of human beings).

This is what you really want to get:  it’s more likely than not that if you attempt to only change an external environment or set of circumstances that you will end up with the same level of dissatisfaction (or even higher) than you were experiencing previously.  Bummer, right?

We’re all familiar with the saying “if nothing changes, nothing changes,” but what if we’re changing the WRONG THING?

Attempting to change the way a toxic corporate environment makes you feel (because your departure certainly isn’t going to do a damn thing for the toxic corporate environment itself) by leaving it all together certainly seems logical.  After all, if you’re not there, it can’t affect you, right?

WRONG.

Here’s a little uncomfortable truth: if you don’t learn a certain lesson from a certain experience, the Universe loves you so much that it will keep giving you opportunities to LEARN THE SAME LESSON ... over and over and over again.  As many times as it takes, in fact.

This is uncomfortable because it feels like victim-blaming.  Daaaaaaayum, Tihanna, your client had a terrible job with toxic culture and then she went to another terrible job with toxic culture and your reaction is that it’s her fault because she didn’t learn a lesson from the universe?I? Well, remember: I’m the coach who hugs you before throwing you off the bridge and then I’ll likely jump with you! So, ready to jump into some big “T” truth? The answer here is while the situation definitely wasn’t her “fault,” her interpretation and experience of the situation was indeed of her own “creation.”  *mic drop:).

Consider the following truths:

  1. Toxic work environments can affect everyone.

  2. But the environment doesn’t have to affect you.

I used to work in a news environment that was extremely toxic for me.  It was a corporate culture of bullying, intolerance, racism, sexism, false and unrealistic expectations and promises, gaslighting, overwhelm, overwork and more.  My response?  I turned into a hard, aggressive, boundary-driven human with an attitude and posture of defensiveness, anger, and self-protection.  I bounced between Energy Levels 1 and 2 (Victim and Martyr) constantly. (For more on this, check out the Energetic Self Perception Chart).

It was unhealthy.  Yes, the environment was unhealthy.  But so was I. 

After many years of life-changing inner work, I was able to make the choice NOT to allow what was outside (external circumstances) to dictate what is inside (inner experience). This is a deeply meaningful and intentional way to approach toxic situations – it involves taking back your own power and elevating your own energy (and doesn’t involve even the smallest smidgen of victim-blaming).

Engaging in The Great Reflection

How do you feel after meeting with your co-workers on the job?  Are you upbeat, motivated, and inspired?  Or are you tired, drained, and feeling unbalanced?  Most professionals are not aware of (or won’t fully acknowledge) how the interactions they have with others truly affects their energy (which, in turn, affects mood and job performance).  They wonder why they feel aggressive or dejected after speaking with certain people.  How you choose to handle relationships with your colleagues has a large effect on your personal thoughts, feelings, and actions, which ultimately determines your professional growth at an organization.

If you find yourself in a toxic work environment where the external elements are outside of your control (hint:: this is true for ALL external environments and circumstances), elevating your energy to maintain both your peace of mind and sense of calm is important to achieving optimal performance (both on and off the job).

Here are six practical ways to make this happen: 


1. Communicate. Communicate. Communicate.

Communication is the one of the biggest things that can either connect or disconnect human beings. Think of any war, political conflict or any failed relationship you’ve personally had and I guarantee a lack of communication or a “breakdown” in talks is at the heart of it. In toxic environments, the ability to speak directly and openly (with compassion) in the moment is critical. When something happens, don’t talk about it later with friends, other colleagues or family members. Speak directly to the person about it, preferably in the moment. This is not about telling anyone off and can be uncomfortable or even scary but sharing your experience and listening to what they have to say with intention is a learnable skill. The art of engaging in difficult conversations, giving/receiving negative feedback and handling challenging questions are topics I coach clients around in my speaker trainings.

2. Take time for you.

Limit your time with toxic co workers so that you have time to become deeply aware of your thoughts and feelings at work.  Once you notice that you’re feeling drained or tired after interacting with certain co-workers, start limiting your time with those people. This is not about “blocking” or “avoiding” people but very much about allowing yourself room to get your own energy in check. Eventually, as you get better at shifting your energy and remaining “conscious” inside of “unconscious” environments, you will not need to do this as much, but initially it's important because nothing is more important than how you feel. Your emotions (a.k.a ‘energy in motion’) is part of what gives you access to manifesting and creating so keeping your energetic “frequencies” on the higher end is important and your emotions are indicators of these levels. This might be difficult if you work in close, physical proximity or Zoom/Slack daily with a team or a person who is negative.  In those instances, simply decrease your amount of communication with them in real time - do more intentional listening vs. responding (disclaimer: this should not mimic the silent treatment).  There isn’t any need to be rude or mean, but prioritizing yourself and well-being is helpful for your career - and critical for maintaining interactions that are healthy.


3. Put boundaries in place…and stick to them.

In today’s digital world, interruptions have become a way of life.  It’s not uncommon to experience social media updates coming in by the second, constant emails, text messages, phone calls, and colleagues dropping by just to chat.  This can consume your time!  Reclaim your focus by establishing clear boundaries for interruptions while you are working.  To eliminate in-person distractions, get one of those reversible “Do not disturb – Come in” signs for your office or make use of that “do not disturb” feature on your phone or Slack to silence notifications. Create a ‘no-meeting’ day or “think tank” day for yourself and/or your team and communicate that to your colleagues.

The most important person to set a boundary with though is yourself. How often do you “say” you won’t check email for a certain time but then find yourself peeking at your phone or laptop during your self-designated quitting time. Important to note: most companies don’t require that you put their email on your personal devices - you made that choice and you can re-choose. 

4. Use powerful and meaningful affirmations.

“Nothing outside gets to create what’s happening inside” – simple, powerful words I use to empower myself to take responsibility for the protection of my own energy and (as Eckhart Tolle says in the “Power of Now”) to not make an enemy out whatever “present” moment I find myself in.

For more affirmations, see this article.


5. Release negativity.

When you release people and associations that are not constructive and/or positive, this frees you up to move forward in numerous ways. Don’t be afraid to let go or walk away if you need to. “Release to increase” is the mantra here and sometimes releasing is exactly what’s needed. Many people are able to focus on the things they want by eliminating distractions, drama, and negativity.  As long as it's not used as a way to avoid, this can also help you take action faster and improve in areas where you want to excel. Energy flows where attention goes they say.  Letting go creates space for new, better things to come into your life.  Sometimes, that means letting go of a job, project and/or client that’s not positively adding to your mental health and wellness. What do you need to let go of to get ready for the success you want in your career?

6. Focus on what’s important.

Focusing your energy is vital if you feel things spinning out of control.  This involves channeling your thoughts in one positive direction, being calm, and consciously considering your priorities.  Try writing down your top 3-5 priorities everyday.  Make completing these tasks non-negotiable even if you have to change other habits.  When you are relaxed and have a clear idea of what you need to do, the odds of achieving your goals increases dramatically. 

Now, to take this to the next level, after you list out all of your “to-do’s,” write out who you need to “be” to get these tasks successfully completed. I’m talking about ‘ways of being’. Perhaps you need to be courageous, urgent, and responsible, or loving, trusting, curious, quiet, calm etc. Once you are clear “who” you need to be to get the “thing” done in the environment you’re in, focus more on “being” that first before trying to “do” anything.

I talk more about this process of “becoming” in my “Success is an ‘INSIDE-OUT’ Job” workshop, which I’ll be running again soon 🙂. 

If a toxic work environment is affecting how you feel on the job, by all means, join the Great Resignation!  But if you want to make sure you don’t take that toxic culture with you when you leave, make sure you also join the Great Reflection - it's a big opportunity to create a “both/and” situation for yourself!

While limiting the time you spend with draining people and putting boundaries in place are a good start, it’s most important for you to consider the things you can always control.  Releasing negativity, focusing on what’s important, choosing your ways of being, allowing your negative emotions (but not being controlled by them), and intentionally creating a relaxing environment will put you in a position to create lasting success.  How can you improve your peace of mind?  Let me know in the Comments!